you vote for the Donald because,
1- Miami's multicultural climate is too humid. You're considering relocating to Pampa, Texas,
2- you have a big wall fetish,
3- Donald is 6'2 tall, rich and blonde, what else can a man or a woman desire?
4- you dislike people with foreign accents (just that),
5- you approve of the Donald's taste in young tall slavic-looking women,
6- you admire the Donald's proven ability to avoid paying taxes,
7- you're in awe of the Donald's deep understanding of international relations,
8- you're proud owner of two AR-15s, one for you, one for your wife (yes, she's a Woman For Trump),
9- though you're an anti-government alt-right republican, some members of your family receive government assistance (& you still blame the government) .